10:59:00 PM
How did 'not-finishing-college' change my life
10:59:00 PMOkay, it might seems I am a quitter. Well, I don't think I am. I just stopped doing things just because I thought I should and because ...
Okay, it might seems I am a quitter. Well, I don't think I am. I just stopped doing things just because I thought I should and because of other people.
When I passed my maturita exam and successfully ended my studies at high school, I didn't want to go to college, at least not straight away. I needed some time to think about my life, about my next step, however, this discussion was impossible with my parents, because they knew I was smart and not going to college would be a disaster. I lived with them, they paid my bills and I was affraid to leave my safe place and go living on my own.
So I went to the college and studied. One year, two years, three years and then it came. I didn't pass one exam and I knew I would have to study one extra year to get my bachelor degree. Maybe this unsuccessful exam was just what I needed and at that very moment I realized I was doing something I didn't want to do and I wasn't enjoying this student's life - no parties, no pubs, just school. From Monday to Friday. Somedays from 7 in the morning, somedays to 8 in the evening. And I hated going there. I was nervous from my coming exams, I was doing homework all the time, some subjects I didn´t even fully understand and I enjoyed only some of them. Well, not many in fact. In most of them I enjoyed more spending time with my friends, than actually enjoying the subject itself.
I found out that not studying gives me freedom. I had more time on things I actually liked and I could learn only things I want to trully learn. For example languages. I felt there was more space in my brain. I even started learning Russian (again) and I loved it. Okay, to be completely honest and fair, I met some good friends at school and of course, learnt a bunch new things, I just didn´t feel like I need to go there. I didn´t even wanted to do this job I would be able to do after finishing school, but instead of quitting right away, I found a part-time job, then another part-time job and then I quit. And didn´t tell my parents. I pretended I was going to school and told them like 3 months after quitting.
My mom´s reaction surprised me completely. She wasn´t sad, dissapointed, angry or anything. She really supported me and understood my decision. On the other hand, my dad, he´s still pissed. Even nowadays. Years after I quit. Everytime he has a chance, he tells me how stupid I was not to finish school. I get it. I don´t have a ´traditional´job from 8 to 5. I do things differently. I do them my way. I live with my girlfriend right now, I am capable of paying my own bills, rent, food and everything. I am self- sufficient and behave as an adult.
I never regreted my decision about school. I know there is no way of coming back and I´m fine with that. I´m happy. The only thing I sometimes regret is not quitting sooner.
Kate
By the way... if you wanna know more about my part time job, one of them was working in a little cafe and I wrote a whole post about it.
